Flying Random Thoughts Entry no. 1

Since I won't be able to give up flying altogether for writing, I might as well pick up the best things I've heard my flight colleagues, and write about it.

For my first ever, I quote my recent senior whom I'll refer to as Himitsu-chan.

"We've all had choices to make."

And I agree. I've just married the only guy who hasn't faltered with his devotion for me for all of 7 years. I could've, at any point before our wedding day chosen to just drop it, but I went on ahead and said "I do". I wouldn't say I was teeming with other choices, but the fact remains that I could've done something else. I could for example, get lost in Kathmandu and never get to be heard of again. Well, I guess I'm just saying. Yet, I chose my husband, as he chose me and here we are in our cozy apartment playing family with my stuffed turtle until we finally get real ones( kids, I mean.)

It might have been different, 7 years ago, if I had chosen to go down a different road. I might have been happier, or I might be drowning in sorrow. But I've made choices. It might not have lead me to where I intended to have gone to, nonetheless it landed me where I needed to go.

The bookworm running out of bookshelves

I don't have that habit of going into a bookshop and aim to actually buy a book, especially when the best sellers fetch for exorbitant prices I choose not to be able to afford. I do, however, buy a book regardless of its stature and, call me a scrooge if you must but these best-buy ones are the books that I'd rather give a chance to.

To be really honest (and obnoxious), I could finish a 400 page book in two days, and this is why my husband disagrees with the frivolous buying of expensive books, or even normal books for that matter. The poor thing can only do as much though when we're at the checkouts with yet another book or two to fill the shelf. At the end of the day when the books have been read, and me trying to go back the pages to see if there could be anything at all that I could've missed, it is with sore realization that I have in fact, digested 75dirhams in just one sitting. It is anything but a waste of money, but sometimes I wish I lingered on for much longer and make the book worth of its every penny.

To resolve this dilemma, I have come to a resolution to keep my books to a number and after that, give the excess away to a public library. I might come up with a list of must-have books with the help of my bookworm friends, but at this point I have yet to find out how my resolution might actually fare in the short term, with really good books being published by the minute. I don't even know if the house my husband plans to have made for us, would even have a personal library of some sort, so the number of books I can keep is still another variable.

On my opinion, I really don't own that much yet, and so I could give in to hoarding books still. My intention now though is to plan for the future of the books I read, which ones that are to grow old with me, and which ones I would eventually let go. That way maybe I could save me some bookshelf space, and at the same time, give other bookworms like me, a go for reading without shelling out hard-earned cash. For sure, free books are way better than cheap books, no matter how incredibly shabby that makes me sound! At the end of the day, I might feel better that I have done for the books I read, my share in its long journey.

Inspired by Paulo Coelho everytime I purchase a book, who I quote ".. but as soon as I've finished a book, I let it go; I give it to someone else, or to the public library. My intention is not to save forests or to be generous. I simply believe that a book has its own journey to make, and should not be condemned to being stuck on a shelf."

Wedding Gift

Touched by how truly personalized this wedding gift is from my cousin
(and now, godmother) Ate Dynah and her family.

A new possibility

I just had an epiphany while browsing through Facebook.

One of my college friends who posted an album in my wedding's honor, also has quoted me and at the same time, reiterated to me, the desires of my subconscious. I still am amazed at how her simple gesture of remembering the one-time affair also served to me as the sign I've been asking for the longest time.

And now that the ever so-elusive Cheshire Cat has grinned on me, I might as well go down the road to which He points, and start having tea with my newfound dream.

Poetry Octoberfest

 

There are moments that you just want to freeze time.

And froze time, I did, by taking this picture.

What's amazing about it is that,

it was a wonderful, warm and sunny afternoon.

 

The Burj Khalifa is the highest architectural structure in the world.

Nobody knows until when.

But for the meantime, I wish to get inside,

just to get a marvelous point of view of the outside

from 2000 feet up.

 

 

The Oriental in me will always crave,

even for a classy, once in a blue moon dinner,

something eaten with chopsticks,

and something sweet and sour.

(Noodle Factory)

 

 However we have managed to get our own photographs, 

we still suffer of getting heads chopped.

For all six years have we not thought of,

getting a tripod of some sort? 

We have to live with the two sides of things.

I always have been quite transparent with how my life goes on. I don't tend to editorialize what I don't need to editorialize. Maybe this is because, after a long time of believing in fairy tale lives some people make others believe they have, I have come to realize that our lives really aren't as complicated as we think. Sure, most of us have had ups and downs, but out of roughly 31% percent of cancer stricken people in the whole world, or the almost 50% of people on the planet who thrive only on Php 112.50 ($2.50) or even less, who are we to say that life is hard?

However, I wasn't on the verge of making readers feel bad as they go about sipping their mocha frappucinos and writing in coffee shops like me. I just had to get a feeling out of my chest, as well as an ideal that has written itself, in my litany of ideals;

A decision one makes, even for the sake of happiness, will still have sprinklings of sadness. Because, that is the how things are meant to be. Otherwise, life would be mundane, and probably not worth living.

I have figured this, while looking out the balcony and contemplating on some things. I have actually fallen to the fairy tale trap, thinking that "happily ever after" is never going to be tainted with tears, with disappointments, with bitterness. And that is because, after all those tales and movies, I tried to relate my real life to the reel life, which are worlds apart! Music does not play when my beloved and I kiss, and I don't necessarily cry from behind a door when we fight, all for a good reason: this is the truth! Fairy tales and romance movies tend to bend over backwards in sugaring every scene, resulting in girls who think that their lives and the life of Meg Ryan in the City of Angels, may somewhat be the same. Life is only as complicated as we allow it to be, and the more we idealize that someday a frog might turn into a handsome prince, the more we will be disappointed that the thing we have puckered our lips for, will remain a slimy frog.

I'm not a cynic however, I don't close my mind into possibilities that they might someday discover a miracle cure-all or come up with food supplies that outweigh the hunger and famine in Somalia. I just think that, in order for us to overcome our daily lives, we must first accept the truths about victory and defeat, and live with that. The truth about things that take time to reap good results and perseverance amidst despair. I think that the best things emerge where there is balance of good and bad. If you have lived in one full year of sadness, followed by a year of happiness, then you know the balance happens in you.

It has happened to me, and that is why I believe.

HOPE

How I feel like I live again
After a rush of new words
Suddenly I’m inspired
By the pictures I drew
I am fresh, feverish
For once I live again
The art is alive
It is still with me
I love and I live
That’s all I need to do
I need not experience heartbreak
As much as I thought I need to

I just need to realize
That there’s so much beauty about
Being happy, not sober
And living out the day
Like there’s no tomorrow
That beneath every sad face
Is a heart that can rejoice
That it can live
We are the ones to choose
The operative word is how

This is me
Seeing the beauty of all else I can do
So different now that the inspiration
I thought I could only draw
From every falling tear
Could also be found in every laugh
And all the great photographs
That despite the depression seemingly
Unendlessly embracing our daily toll
Hope lives on
When all things have flown away.